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angel girl asked:
My bffs grandpa has pancreus cancer and they were gonna treat it Mondy but it spread.He wont get better and is gonna die.She is so upset I try to make her feel better but it wont work.What do I do shes my bffl and we are like sisters
Question posted courtesy of: 3WayLinks
January 7th, 2007 at 6:48 am
Okay first of all don’t try to make jokes to cheer her up. It won’t work. The best thing to do is let her cry and listen and hand her tissues. She needs to talk. Let her get it out and just listen. It’s all you can do.
January 8th, 2007 at 6:00 am
make sure you ley her know their is always a shoulder to cry on ( yours ) and you are always someone to talk to
January 9th, 2007 at 9:32 am
let her grieve
she may not feel happiness for awhile and thats ok
just be there for support and be a listener if she needs it
don’t worry about making her feel better cuz there is nothing you can say
just let her know that you are there for her
time will heal her
January 10th, 2007 at 4:51 pm
Ask her if she wants to talk about it. If she doesn’t, just let her be and give her some time. Once she feels better, you can go on talking normally to her, just like you are BFFL =]
January 11th, 2007 at 12:05 am
well truly there is nothing you can do but wait for her to come to you. be there, however, in case she needs to talk. dont push her into talking but let her know that you are there and ur not going anywhere. and dont get mad or upset if she becomes angry with your persistence. just make sure u let her know u love and care for her. its easier to talk about a while after you find out something as detrimental as this. i hope for the best for your friends grandfather!
January 13th, 2007 at 8:29 pm
Will with that you can have any one of cancer.When you are with your family talk to them about if you die of cancer because if you don’t and you die from that they are not going to know how to take it
Hope you get better
January 16th, 2007 at 5:14 am
Sorry -she should just be there for him take pictures
make a memory book and remember all the good times
knowing he’s gonna watch over her forever.And you
you should just be there comfort her and be the best
friend you can.
January 16th, 2007 at 8:43 am
there is nothing you can do, apart from be her best friend, let her talk, cry, be angry, whatever, just listen to her, and be with her. Good luck. You are a good friend.
January 17th, 2007 at 4:53 am
Aw hon, I’m so sorry. I wish nobody ever had to go through something as tragic as death ever again. Especially through cancer. My mother passed away of cancer 5 years ago.
Please tell her that it is okay to be emotional. It’s okay to cry.
Tell her to spend as much time with her grandpa as she can. Depending on how old you two are, I would suggest that if her grandfather is put into a palliative care ward (in simple terms : a floor or home for the dying), that she ask her parents before going to see him. It can be very disturbing to someone to see a loved one in such a state.
It’s sad, and unfair, but everyone dies. It is a part of life.
Also, please tell her there are books out there she can read on grief, and how to handle it and the loss of a loved one.
Be there for her as much as you can. Listen to her when she feels down. You will both get past this. As much as it hurts, life goes on with or without the people you love sometimes.
Good luck and my sympathies to both of you.
January 19th, 2007 at 11:39 am
Let her handle it in her own way, be her friend, and be there for her, but there is not really any way you can take away the pain.
January 22nd, 2007 at 8:20 pm
Well, first, don’t talk so much about it to her. It’ll just make her feel worse. Just tell her all things happen for a reason and you will benefit from these things later even though they are painful things to go through. For example: today the guy I was going out with broke up with me. It’s not as heart-breaking as a dying grandfather, but for me, it’s really upsetting. But I know that he will probably be happy with the girl he likes now and that makes me mad but I know I have to move on. Look up from the cold ground and up to the shining sun. Just tell your friend that you are there for her if she needs someone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on. Don’t say anything else. Leave her alone. This is a horrible chapter in her life. But letting her know you are there for her comforts her.
January 23rd, 2007 at 1:59 pm
Cancer is so difficult for anyone to face. Be patient with the grieving process. Time heals all wounds.
Remind her that so many people are going through the same thing right now. I just lost my mom 10 days ago. It seems like everyone has cancer. It’s so important for us to take care of ourselves and eat healthy so that it doesn’t happen to us.
Talk to her about how special her grandpa was. Let her share her memories and feelings. That will help her go through the process of grief and feel better.