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My Great aunt has been in hospital since december alothough she is out now, she got out last week, and i thought it was nothing serious, I have a phobia of hospitals so i never went in to see her, And my parents told me its cancer she has and they cant treat it as she is too old and she will die, so they are letting her home to Go.. I am annoyed my parents never told me the truth, as my real auntie and another close relative died recently of cancer and this will be my 3rd funeral and i am only 13…. I dont know what to do… be annoyed at parents or not… they were only protecting me i guess…?
I dont think that hospitals are going to steal my organs! HAHA! Its cause i went to see my auntie everynight for 3 months straight, and i saw cancer patients every night and then my aunt died in hospital so it just brings back the memorys!
Question posted courtesy of: Caffeinated Content
May 2nd, 2007 at 12:27 am
They are just trying to protect you. Explain to them that you are old enough to understand and that you want to know when someone is sick, so that you can prepare yourself.
May 3rd, 2007 at 2:35 pm
In my opinion, it is essential to be completely honest with kids from the very beginning, but in terms that are age-appropriate.
Your parents may not have wanted to confuse you with the details of choosing to treat or not treat the cancer. Sometimes the patient wants to keep it all private until the decision has been made.
Your phobia of hospitals is unfounded. They won’t snatch your body and steal your organs, you know.
May 4th, 2007 at 5:58 am
hi! dear i wouldnt be annoyed at your parents really!
i know its not an easy thing about a year ago i had to tell my kids that their grandmother (my mother) was dying from cancer! it was the hardest thing i ever had to do and i have one your age and other 2 younger! but i am pretty sure your parents were only trying to protect you i know your age you understand alot but its really not an easy thing for parents to talk about beleive me i know!
and im really sorry for your losses you are so young to be going through this!
but take it one day at a time dear and now that you know my advice would be try to spend alot of time with her when you can you wont regret it!
i wish you well! good luck!
May 6th, 2007 at 10:15 pm
Ahh yes - the half truths for the sake of the kids! My parents were not telling me my mother had cancer - they did not want to spoil some plans us “kids” had. Us “kids” were all grown with families of our own and my mother died before our planned event. It is just something parents do to protect us “kids”. You will probably learn from this and do it differently when you have a family of your own- but for now, just forgive and realize it was out of love. Now go see your Antie and just let her know you care. Sorry for all the sorrow you have had in your short life - Take care.
May 9th, 2007 at 4:03 am
You sound frustrated. You ask some very big questions that stop me. Cancer sucks big time. Dying from cancer sucks more. I think I understand that you don’t like reliving your personal unhappy experiences from the hospital. I can only try and guess how hard this one is on you and at the same time how hard it is on your parents. I work in the hospital with patients who have cancer. I see the worst. I can certainly understand your phobia about the hospital. I was diagnosed with cancer after working on this cancer wing for 11 years. Fortunately for me I am living with cancer rather than dying from it for the past two years.
My honest answer to you would be to sit your folks down and let them know you feel cheated (?) hurt(?) disappointed(?) overwhelmed(?). Maybe, just maybe, you can come up with the best answer from within and then you can help me when I try to explain to my colleagues why some loving family members find it impossible to visit their family members who are stuck in the hospital. It is not that they don’t love them it is because they do.
May 9th, 2007 at 11:46 pm
Hey you don’t know me obviously but..
The solution to your problem can maybe be yoga or massages. Yoga keeps your mind off the situation and massaging gets rid of stress and distractions. It relaxes the body in many ways that is why I am sugesting it.
Don’t be annoyed at your parents. They are the people who raised you when you were a child and who care for you and love you. This may be a very upsetting time for you but you have to understand it is not their fault. They are only protecting you..
LOVE YA CAITLIN
xxxxxx